(Can you stand some morning humor from LZ?)
It's morning.
Eyes open.
Body: I don't want to be awake
Me: It's inevitable.
Body: Ok
(pause)
Body: Get up.
Me: Ok
Body: Take me to the restroom.
Me: Ok
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: Take me to the restroom again.
Me: You just went.
Body: But I want to go again.
Me: I'm going to ignore you.
Body: You'll be sorry if you do.
Me: Ok. Fine.
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: I'm thirsty.
Me: I know. Give me a second.
Body: I want a shower.
Me: I know. Give me a second.
Body: When are we going to eat?
Me: Give me a minute!
(30 seconds later ...)
Body: Is a minute up yet?
Me: Ok. Ok........ (sigh) We'll shower.
(30 seconds later ...)
Body: I want the water hotter.
Me: Ok, it's hotter.
Body: Are you going to wash my hair today?
Me: No.
Body: But........
Me: Just no.
Body: Ok. But.....
Me: No.
Body: Ok.
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: I want lotion.
Me: I know. Give me a second.
Body: I want it now.
Me: I know. I know. (sigh)
Body: Rub my feet, ok?
Me: Ok.
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: Take me to the restroom.
Me: No.
Body: You'll be sorr........
Me: Ok. Ok.
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: I'm hungry
Me: I know. Give me a second.
Body: I'm thirsty.
Me: You know, don't you, that drinking all this water is why we have to go the restroom all the time, right?
Body: I'm thirsty.
(25 minutes later ...)
Me: You're fed. You're washed. You have lotion. Your feet have been rubbed. Now can I have some time to do my own thing?
Body: You forgot to brush my teeth.
Me: (sigh) You're right.
(5 minutes later ...)
Me: NOW are you satisfied?
Body: We'll see.........
(5 minutes later ...)
Body: I want.......
Me: Shut up.
Body: But.........
Me: Shut up. (pause) You realize, don't you, that if we stay on the planet for 70 years or so, that you will have had so many showers that even God won't be able to count them?
Body: You brush my teeth more times than you shower. (lol)
Me: You're the one who's going to have to tally up the numbers after I'm gone. You know that, right?
Body: Don't count on it...........
***** To follow .. click on the top-left "Follow" of the top menu or "ATOM FEED" at the very-very bottom of the blog. Other subscription options are elsewhere within the blog. To contact the author, please visit: www.nlightpress.com *****
