3am .. the time of waking dreams and revelations.
All things are inter-woven and the dream is no exception. It was only a week or two ago that I was taken so far outside of reality, if we want to call it that, that, once again, I was changed so dramatically that I became another person. Not a new experience, this becoming new type of thing. But this particular event was so incredible and so far beyond even my ever-reaching imagination that I knew instantly this was something I would never speak of. My nature is to share but after examination of my decision, I realized that relating the experience could possibly do more harm than good.
The changes however .. that is another story. What would come out of the intense and incredible change I'd gone through? The dream seems to be a precursor, and I find the possibilities exciting beyond words.
I am in a vast and crowded space that looks like nothing I've ever seen before. A man in a mud-colored robe stands beside me. On my right is a 'monster' so massive that all I can see is a portion of his face. He opens his mouth to bare his teeth and I am looking into an abyss that seemingly has no end. Each tooth is, I am told, 13 feet long. There are many.
The man in robes hands me an old, rusty, steel hammer. "Hit yourself in the head hard enough to pass out and you won't feel anything when he eats you. You'll live in his belly and you won't even be aware of the fact that you're in his belly. You'll just live."
I looked at the hammer in my hand. I looked at him. I looked at the 'monster.' And wondered if he thought I was insane. "Why would I do that?" I asked.
He pointed to a crowd of people that I hadn't noticed before. "They're all doing it." He shrugged nonchalantly, as though that was explanation enough.
Irritated with his nonsense, I turned away and watched as, one by one, people hit themselves with hammers and entered the crushing jaws of the 'monster.' They seemed robotic. They seemed fatalistic. They seemed not to know that they had a choice in the matter.
I turned back to the man in robes. "Take this," I demanded, shoving the hammer into his hand.
He looked incredibly surprised. "What are you going to do?" he cried, alarmed.
"I'm not going in there to live, I can tell you that," I snapped. I turned to my left instinctively. "Bring me the other option," I said loudly. In truth, I had no conscious idea of what I was talking about but apparently, on some level, I did know.
A man in a white robe appeared. He had a rope in his hand and on the other end of the rope was a 'monster' who appeared quite similar to the one who was occupied with eating people and storing them in his belly. This 'monster' was passive and obeyed instantly when the man in white robes quietly told him to roll over. In an instant his underbelly was in clear view. He laid on his back without resistance, waiting.
The white-robed man gestured at me to lay down on the exposed underbelly of the 'monster.' "We'll take you to another truth," he said quietly.
I crawled up onto the underbelly, doing my best to ignore the sensations of the extremely unusual texture of his skin and the uncomfortable 'feeling' of the experience. As soon as I was 'nestled' into the folds of the clammy skin, we were moving. We picked up speed. We were racing in the opposite direction of 'the trap.'
I didn't look back.
It was 4am. My 'transporation mode' was gone and I stood alone with the white-robed Master. We stood in the center of nothingness. I was cells separated by space and I was nothing at all.
"Pain is the controlling factor," he advised quietly. "You no longer have to agree to the reality of the lie."
"Pain is the controlling factor." Here .. at 6am .. I sit staring at my journal. "Pain Is The Controlling Factor" is the title of a book I began to write four years ago.
For more information on Lauren Zimmerman's work, please visit: www.nlightpress.com
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