Showing posts with label past love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label past love. Show all posts

Monday, December 10, 2012

The Truth & Lies of Love







The scene was one I'd been in a thousand times before. The huge expanse of windows above the control panel gave a 190 degree vision of the Universe beyond. Only the dimmest of reflections came back at us, due to the low interior lighting.

The two tall-backed, black chairs sat directly in the middle of the control panel. As I silently approached from behind the chairs, my eyes caught his in the reflection of the glass. The human side of me felt tears slide down my cheeks. How does one explain the emotions of seeing a loved one who lives in such a different realm than oneself, knowing that the meeting will soon be over .. again. But I had been in a fragile mood anyway, feeling the heightening of energy around Planet Earth, knowing the changes that were coming for the people.

The air of the gigantic craft felt different than ever before. Though it held 100,000 beings, it felt so silent that I imagined we were alone. No sound, no nuance, no sign of life other than the two of us.

"Commander," I murmured quietly, taking my usual seat next to him.

"Dear One," he murmured back, with nothing more than a slight nod of his head.

I felt his mood engulf me as though we were becoming one. The solemnity of the moment felt like none other that I'd experienced with him before. "I've been feeling you constantly," I advised him quietly. "The distance between us feels less, and yet the distance between us feels more. I came to ask you why, if you can tell me?"

He turned away from me, would not meet my eyes, but spoke. Words that shook the very soul of me. I had not expected anything like this when I had made up my mind to talk with him. I stared at his slender back, tears streaming, until I realized that he was looking at me in the glass. Our reflections stared at each other, my tears falling like drops of liquid diamonds, reflected a dozen times by the curvature of the glass.

"I do not understand," I whispered to his glassed image.

"You will when you come back home," he said quietly.

We both stared silently ahead, not speaking, adjusting to the new energy that now lay between us. The dim light shifted somehow and our reflections fell away, leaving us both in our solitary darkness.

He was the first to break the spell we were under. Normally adroit at changing topics, this time he stumbled slightly. He and I would both think about his prior revelation for days, perhaps years, to come. But for now, the topic would turn to one of healing for Earth, which it so often did. "You know, one of the most common wounds of the human experience, one that must be healed in order for that society to move forward, is the feeling that one is separate from love."

I nodded, fully understanding but still unable to speak.

"When one loves on that planet, the first thought, the first expectation, is that one will be loved in return. After all, each of you come from love and so it is who you are and what you expect as your reality. It can be harsh to find that the rest of the world, or even a single person, does not give love in return."

"Indeed," I murmured, knowing the issue firsthand, all too well. My thoughts leapt immediately to the recent visitation from my ex, who now resided on 'the other side' and who had come to me to apologize for withholding love. I sensed a theme in the recent string of other-world experiences and messages.

"The results of not being loved can cause damage that never gets repaired," he continued. "One constantly, even if only subconsciously, finds fault with oneself, trying to understand what he or she did to cause another person not to love. After all, if one IS love than how does one not express that? And why? Why does a person step so far away from the love that they are, simply because they live upon a physical planet?"

It was a question I'd asked myself a hundred times or more. Why does the physicality of life on Earth cause one to lose one's self so completely?

"The separation from one's Truth, the fact that they are love, their origins are love, plays a monumental role in the belief of separation. Not loving creates a lie, which causes pain, which is also a lie because it is born of a falsehood."

"Indeed," I murmured thoughtfully.

"And then more lies are generated as each person searches one's self to find out 'what's wrong' with themselves. The truth unravels into a delirium of pain and lies, for no one is unlovable and no one is unloved. But when love is withheld, the natural thing to do is look for an answer to why. And the questioning begins, the lies grow, the pain crushes, and the truth is lost underneath it all."

"You are wise," I said quietly.

He nodded just slightly, without answering, but I heard his thought. "We are all wise. It's just that some have forgotten."

"Do you have any answers for all of this?" I asked, nodding slightly at the distant Earth, drifting silently in the distance.

"The energy is changing on Earth," he advised. "The opportunity for each person to become more as one with their own truth is upon them now. I speak of this key to healing for it is, indeed, a great key. One can not build a new reality upon a foundation of old pain and misunderstanding. Many think they have healed past the wondering of why they were not loved. But it is easy to toss such pain into a corner, toss a lot of platitudes upon it, and consider it healed. As the time for transition rapidly approaches, it would be wise for people to look within themselves for these secrets that they hide even from themselves. Find the truth that you really were, and are, loved, despite the 3-D appearance of things." He finally turned to me. "I can assure every person of this. Each person is loved by all others. I say that without hesitation. Life on Earth causes people to behave in ways that are not their truth. I am here to tell them what the truth really is."

He paused and scanned the great skies for a silent moment, his dark eyes sparkling with the bottomless compassion that I'd always known him to give. "Life on Earth has been a matrix of lies for a very long time," he finally said. "Things are about to get much more real." He turned to stare into my eyes with a gaze that was eternal. "If the people want to embrace the next layer of real, they need to begin within themselves."

My infinite feelings for him wouldn't allow me to speak. I simply nodded.

And then he said the same words to me that my ex had spoken to me, from 'the other side.'

"I will see you when you get home."









***** To follow .. click on the top-left "Follow" of the top menu or "ATOM FEED" at the very-very bottom of the blog. Other subscription options are elsewhere within the blog. To contact the author, please visit: www.nlightpress.com *****

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Past Loves & Wisdom




(The quote on this picture gives a deeper understanding of this encounter and the ultimate goal of understanding.)


It's an extremely rare thing for me to be feeling so poorly that I don't do anything at all. But here I was, not thinking anything but drifting quietly in my mind, looking for a place to rest where I didn't feel anything, if only for a moment.

I sensed the energy in the room shift and turned to look toward the source. There stood my ex, who is now on 'the other side.' I was not terribly surprised. He had been coming to get me every night for about two weeks and we'd been soaring through universes and understandings with a happiness I had long ago forgotten.

Delighted to see him, I greeted him before noting the somber look on his face. "What's going on?" I asked a bit hesitantly.

"I need to apologize to you."

"For what? You....."

He stopped me. "I don't need you to tell me I didn't do anything wrong. I know what I did. And I know what I didn't do. And I need you to know that I'm sorry. I impacted your entire life and I now know how I can fix what I did. I need you to hear me. I mean really hear me."

"Absolutely," I assured him. "You know I'll listen."

He moved a few steps closer to me and I could see how vital this was to him. His eyes spoke volumes. "You loved me with all that you are. You gave me all that you are. And I stayed in my own stupidity and ego and loved what you gave me. But I didn't let you know that I loved you. I didn't put the love behind the words. You knew that and heard only 'empty.' I can tell you that I didn't know how to love completely like you do. I can tell you that I was afraid. I can tell you that I was selfish and just wanted what you were giving without having it 'cost' me anything." He laughed. "We both know how selfish I was. No need to talk about that."

His voice became as soft as the touch of an angel. "But what you don't know is that I loved you. I never let you know that." He waved his hand in the air. "I'm the one responsible for all that you're been through since, with these other men."

I immediately jumped to his defense. "How do you figure that?" I almost shouted. "You can't lay that on yourself. I'm the one who let them in and allowed what I did. Not to mention that you have nothing to do with their bad behavior."

"But what I'm trying to tell you is that I DO." I felt his energy settle back, readying himself to explain. "When I refused to let you know that I loved you, even while I knew you were giving me everything including your eternal soul, you 'learned' that this world wasn't going to love you no matter how much you loved it."

I started to protest, but he stopped me.

"You knew with everything that you are inside yourself that I really did love you. But I didn't show you. I didn't tell you and I literally made an effort to keep the truth from you. And so, you doubted what you knew. Not only that I loved you but also that the type of love you believed in was not possible on Earth. But I showed you that it couldn't, or wouldn't, be expressed here. And so, that means you took what you learned from me, or thought you learned from me, and you went out into the world with that false belief."

The relationships, the failures, that came after him flashed through my mind like lightning. I simply sat staring at him in silence.

"You see," he said quietly, "you manifested that false belief every time you tried to love. Your desire to believe in the level of love that you thought was possible was overpowered by the belief that I gave you. That even if you feel that love is really there, it isn't. My refusal to give it to you made you doubt that you knew what was real and what was not."

"And you're here now because?"

He smiled with all the love he had never given me. "Because it's time for me to help you understand that you were right all along." He studied me in silence for a minute and finally stepped forward and kissed me so softly that I might have been kissed by the wing of a butterfly. "You need to know that you were right all along. And you need to know that I love you with everything I am, through all time and space."

He drew back and gave me a rather sad smile. "I'll see you when you get home."


(NOTE: I truly thank each of you who have written and who have posted comments. This has to be one of the most touching blogs that I've written and the fact that it is touching you means more to me than words can say. Don appeared to me a few hours after I wrote this. (he had asked me to write this) He thanked me and then told me that he believed his story would help many others to heal. He thanked me for helping him to be of Service to you. With love, Lauren)(Oh .. another thing .. for some odd reason the blog is not allowing me to comment on your comments and so please forgive that. I do read each comment personally.)



Lauren Zimmerman

www.dimensionsbeyond.com

www.nlightpress.com







***** To follow .. click on the top-left "Follow" of the top menu or "ATOM FEED" at the very-very bottom of the blog. Other subscription options are elsewhere within the blog. To contact the author, please visit: www.nlightpress.com *****